I was driving today and listening to the song by Casting Crowns, "Praise You In This Storm." It is a song that has gotten me through a lot in the past, and reminded me to turn my eyes to Jesus and to be grateful for all the blessings even in the midst of chaos in my life. Listening to it today, though, I felt even more of God's Truth "click" in my head and my heart.
I realized today that I distance God so much from myself. When I pray, even in my head it seems to always start with "Dear God," like a form letter to some big guy in the sky that I don't know. Long road trips with friends are often times of great in depth discussions about life and all kinds of things, but I have never started one of those discussions with my friends with, "Dear Nikki, how are you doing?" So today, for perhaps the first time in my life, I pretended that God was sitting in the passenger seat of my car as I drove and that we were having a talk. Like friends. I guess I shouldn't say I pretended, because God WAS there. He is always there. But, it was the first time that I was able to use my imagination to personify Him, and make the talk more than a form letter.
I realized during our talk how much I have relied on my husband in the past for things that only God can give me. I realized how the yearning inside me for other people to recognize me, and compliment me, and encourage me, is a yearning that only God will constantly be able to provide in perfect balance to the other things that I need. I realized a lot of things.
I hope that this break through is the beginning of really diving deeper into a relationship with Christ.
Can any of you relate to having a similar break through? Or maybe a break through in some other area of your walk with God? Please share! I need all the break throughs I can get!
And if you haven't heard "Praise You In This Storm" by Casting Crowns, then definitely watch the video below. Or even if you have heard it, you should watch it anyway!
<3 Rebekah
This is so beautiful! I recently had that break through when I was mad about some sort of life situation and my husband said, "are you mad at God? Well, tell him about it!". And he was right. I realized I can go to him for EVERYTHING because he is my closest friend and Father.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this post!
You are so amazingly smart (on top of a million other beautiful wonderful traits). I have the exact same thoughts and recently realized that when I really sit down and think about my life, I have everything I have ever wanted (someone who loves me unconditionally, a place of my own to call home, and a dog ---or 2). But why is life so HARD....Because we are constantly searching for exactly what you said "for other people to recognize me, and compliment me, and encourage me" but we have to have faith and realize how blessed we really are, even if "nothing goes our way" and think beyond ourselves, even to think as far out as what we can do for others, without looking for feedback from humans. With selflessness comes happiness??? Who knew being an "adult" would be so complex.
ReplyDeleteWOW I actually wrote you back on your BLOG!! miss you and love you and think you are a fantastic human, mommy, friend, sister, daughter, wife, etc :)
J